If you're easily offended stop reading now.
This is as far as you want to go.
For those of you still reading, you may or may not agree with everything I have to say here, but guess what that's why I'm writing it and not you.
Check back daily and I may or may not have updated, depending on how drunk or pissed I may be at any one time.
If you're reading this because you're looking for some political or social commentary on what it means to be living in the time of the death of the American Dream, somehow you have been misguided. I'm just gonna tell you about what pisses me off in-between jerk-off sessions, drinking and naps. Sorry.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

This weeks Top 10 things I hate.

I've decide to make this list the Top 10 things I hate, because there's just so much stuff out there I can't stand. There are still plenty of people who need an ass whooping but there are many more things that just piss me the fuck off.

10. The Economy-I tell you what. I wish I could use the economy as an excuse for everything the way the news does. Like if a friend asks me to help them move this weekend. "I would help, but you know with the way the economy is right now I just don't think I'm gonna be able to do it."

9. Perez Hilton-This fucking douche asks a question to some ditzy fucking pageant contestant and then is gonna get upset with her opinion. If I threw a giant hissy fit every time I asked a stupid person a question I would never be able to order food at a restaurant, and I would never be able to go to the South again. Fuck this whiny queen.

8. The Weather-Fuck the weather.

7. David Spade-I was unaware that this monstrously large tool still had his own fucking T.V. show until I saw a commercial for it the other day. The fact that someone out there is watching it is pissing me off to no end right now.

6. H1N1 Virus-Yea I know it's called swine flu. But unless all you morons don't stop calling it that, every country that is dummer than ours is gonna keep banning our pork products and creating more job loss. Just call it "Ikea Flu" or "French Wine Flu" something that fucks somebody else over.

5. Ryan Seacrest-I don't know what to say really, fuck this dude.

4. Fox News-Earlier this week some moron on this channel(Sean Hannity) proclaimed that Kim Kardashian is a role model to young girls in this country. Yea good work Sean, I know every father in the nation wants to see his little girl in a sex tape with her mouth wrapped around some guys giant schlong. Fucking morons.

3. Fred Durst-Slowly making his way to Number one.

2. My fucking Hair-I'm starting to come to grips with the fact that it's falling out and I'm ordering a shitload of propecia and that shit better work, or I'm gonna have to start working out like 12 hours a day. There is no way I can go through life fat and bald. Nothing says hey ladies get it while you can, like an overweight really angry bald guy.

1. Jay Leno-I thought we got rid of this guy and now he's got another show that is the exact same thing as the last one except now it's on an hour and a half earlier. He's not fucking funny NBC, get it through your thick fucking skulls. He never has been and never will be funny. Have you seen Jay Leno's stand up before he was the host of the Tonight Show. I would rather change a old man's shitty diaper with my mouth than watch 5 minutes of Jay Leno stand up, honestly.