If you're easily offended stop reading now.
This is as far as you want to go.
For those of you still reading, you may or may not agree with everything I have to say here, but guess what that's why I'm writing it and not you.
Check back daily and I may or may not have updated, depending on how drunk or pissed I may be at any one time.
If you're reading this because you're looking for some political or social commentary on what it means to be living in the time of the death of the American Dream, somehow you have been misguided. I'm just gonna tell you about what pisses me off in-between jerk-off sessions, drinking and naps. Sorry.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

E.S.P.N. Did I Fuck Your Mom? Part 2

In the last post I covered the basic reason I have come to loathe the Worlwide Leader on a daily basis. In this part we will cover the people on the channel that need to go, and some of the shows that we could do without.

First off, everybody on Sunday NFL countdown except for Ron Jaworski needs to go. Berman stopped being funny a week after he started and now is more of a annoyance than anything else. He needs to be "rumblin, bumblin, stumblin, whoop, whooping," to the fucking unemployment line. Get rid of this fat fuck. The rest of the panel can barely speak English, and if I have to listen to Keyshawn Johnson relate everything that is going on in Football now with what was going on in his career my head is gonna explode, he was once told by his team to just not even show up, just go home and sit on the couch and we'll pay you, we just don't want you anywhere near the field, we're good. Sounds like a guy I want on my broadcast team. Well I guess he did replace the guy who got caught with hookers and blow in his hotel room. At least Irvin was fun to laugh at though. The show is so long and drawn out, they publicly fellate the fucking Patriots every 5 minutes on there and it needs to go.

Around the horn is another show I could do without. There is a reason these people all became sportswriters at newspapers. They shouldn't be on fucking T.V. If you ask me sportswriters are some of the most sanctimonious pricks to ever walk the earth. I have a tendency to always think I'm right, mostly because I am, but I never think that my opinion on something is what everybody else's view should be. These fucking jerk-offs love having their opinions matter. They get to do the hall of fame voting, they get to vote on the college football standings, when .1% of them have played college football. Now you're gonna put a bunch of them on T.V. and inflate there egos more. I wish my opinion on things had as much influence as these morons, asian women would never drive again that's for sure. There is no reason that these guys should have any say so with anything to do with sports except to write about it. That's it. Letting these guys vote on the College Football standings every year is like giving a busload of Jerry's kids power tools and telling them to build a house, it's fucked. Morons.

Now let's get to my favorite part about the Worlwide Leader in Sports Stuart Scott and Skip Bayless. First of all Stuart Scott is the whitest black guy on the planet. I have jewish friends who are blacker than this guy(if you've seen my friend larry devour a plate of chicken wings you know). I could rub shoe polish on my face and announce the highlights with an urban dicitionary in front of me and do a better job than this guy. It wouldn't be such a problem if he would just face the fact that he is a white man in a black guy's body, but he can't. So he has to try really hard with all the "booyah's" and "takin it to the hizzy" I've never wished so many bad things on a person like I have when I watch this guy doing sportscenter. I'm pretty sure I've wished bad things onto his kids before too. Maybe a mild case of retardation, yes, no, over the line, maybe. I don't care fuck this guy.

My favorite person by far and away on this channel is Skip Bayless. First of all I have absolutely no idea how this guy qualifies to be on ESPN talking about sports. I know he has been a prize winning journalist and once accused Troy Aikman of being gay(where he gets off accusing anyone of being gay is beyond me, just watch this guy for five minutes, he is gayer than AIDS)
but to give this pile of filth his own forum where he can blather on for hours on live T.V. is just pathetic, I would spend more time ripping on this guy, but he doesn't deserve that much space on this blog.

He is the reason I can't stand ESPN now, it's all about opinions and drama and ratings. I just want to see highlights and scores, and interviews. How about broadcasting shit people want to watch. Not shit that is just gonna make them hate every athelete around. I have done plenty of fucked up shit in my life but it's not news because I'm not famous. These athletes are just like you and me, if somebody showed up at my door and told me they were gonna pay me millions of dollars to play sports, you can bet your ass I'm gonna end up on the news someday doing something I shouldn't have, people are gonna make mistakes, especially when you're young and have been given a shit ton of money to play a GAME. All these jackasses on ESPN now just sit around a table and spew on about how stupid these guys are and how they let their team down with their actions. This kind of shit has been going on for decades, Babe Ruth was a drunk womanizer, but to almost every person around he is arguably the greatest baseball player ever. If ESPN were around then he might not of even gotten into the hall of fame. ESPN is just a small picture of basically everything that is wrong with society, nobody wants to make an effort to put something intelligent out there, fuck no, that takes time and effort.