I don't need to have a gun in the car ever.

Earlier today I was in the car with my roomate and he was driving. There was a van in front of us in the lane to our right, when all of a sudden they pull into our lane and slam on the brakes. They put on their turn signal but just sat there and didn't get into the turn lane. So their just at a complete stop right in front of us and my roomate doesn't notice until the last minute and has to swerve around them and almost clips their back end. After we pass them he flips them off and I figured they turned and got on the highway. But then I noticed them pulling up next to us. I lean out the window and start yelling at the guy.

Here is our conversation from what I can remember.
Stupid Middle Easterner(Go Figure)-Is there a problem.
Me-Yeah, you just stopped in the middle of the fucking lane and we almost ran right into you, fucking moron.
Stupid Fuck-It was not my fault.
Me-You are a shitty fucking driver and you almost caused an accident you moron.
Stupid Fuck-Have you ever been confused, It was not my fault.
Me-Oh it's not you're fault you're a shitty driver. Well my bad I'm sorry.(Roll's up window while moron is still talking)

My roomate was laughing so much at my conversation with the guy that I couldn't stay mad at this guy so I just rolled up the window while he was talking. Now if there had been a gun in the car this escalates into a legal problem I just don't need right now. I may not have used it, but I definately would have waved it in his face at least to try and make him shit his pants. I need counseling.

I hate White Trash

If you were standing in line outside of the Newport in Columbus last night waiting to get inot the Twiztid concert. I was the one who drove through the muddy water puddles about 30 miles an hour and douched you all. Your welcome.

By the way I have no idea who Twiztid is but they must be some insane clown posse type band because I have never seen so much white trash dressed in face paint in my entire life. It was horribly pathetic, I almost wish the water I splashed on them was cyanide. That might have been over the line...Yeah I think it was. O.K. I wish it was poo. That better.

I hate the H1N1 Virus and the Economy

I refuse to call the H1N1 virus the "swine flu". You can't get it from eating pork you fucking morons. I would really hate to be a pig farmer right now. If I was a pig farmer I would call up the local news right now and tell them I have their next big story. I would have them come out to the farm with all their cameras, go out into the field and pronounce that I am doing the locals a favor and putting down all my pigs so there is no chance of spreading the swine flu to the town and then proceed to shoot every pig in the pen on live t.v. I'm guessing I would then be pronounced the greatest man alive. The interview would go something like this.

Stupid local reporter douche: So why have you called us out here today.
Me: Well these GD pigs are infecting everyone with their stupid flu, so I thought I would just do my part and stop them from infecting anybody.
Stupic local reporter douche: Well sir, I must say this is a very noble thing you are doing, I mean you're gonna waste your whole years income.
Me: Yes sir, but I'm a goddamn American and this is what needs to be done. We should probably just start putting down Mexicans like this too. That way the Economy will turn around also and they will stop stealing our jobs.
Stupid local reporter douche: Well let me just be the first to say that you sir are a true Patriot.
Me: Fuck yeah.

God we are so fucked.